Tuesday, January 24, 2017

Corporate hyperbole: "Strike Anywhere Matches"

“Diamond Strike Anywhere Matches”
“Lights Quickly and Easily”

Hah! in our just finished box of matches the tips scrape off, the sticks break, and often it takes two or more matches before one lights.  And forget striking anywhere; nothing happens when I scrape one on our fireplace rim.

They may be made from “responsibly managed forests” but using three matches when one should need only one doesn’t seem responsible.  Granted two extra matches isn’t going to decimate any forest, but it certainly decimates my patience.

Seeing the corporate layers listed on the box (see labels below), I can easily imagine those who wrote the slogans for the box rarely if ever use the matches to light a fire.

Hey!  On the plus side they have firelogs made from recycled coffee grounds.  Ah, but that takes all the fun and exercise out of cutting one’s own trees, cutting them to lengths, and splitting the lengths.