What a difference a day makes

Originally published in

Reader Weekly
March 15, 2001

Often when I do something different, I have unexpected problems which might not have happened if I had done the usual.

One weekday in August was unusual in many ways and I had my share of problems.  I planned to go to our cabin in Brimson, Minnesota on Thursday morning instead of Friday afternoon or Saturday morning.  Kathleen Anderson, a Brimson jill-of-all-trades, was to come over at one o’clock to help me do the base for our sauna.

The first problem was at breakfast; I spilled orange juice.  Now I had to wash the table cloth.  Then I forgot to pack some things.  Then the garage door would only open partially.

I eventually got to Brimson at noon and gobbled lunch.  I scurried around to have all the tools and material in place before Kathleen came.

Kathleen came at the appointed time.  In about three hours we had the base level and square.

The rest of the day was a blur of work and reading.  I started getting ready for bed about nine, actually got into bed before ten, and zonked out quickly.

Sometime after eleven I woke up to scratching and peeping sounds.  It was in the stove pipe.  Something was stuck just above the damper, probably a bird.

I really didn’t want to take the stove pipe apart.  I would have soot everywhere, and the bird would probably fly all over the room before I finally got it out of the cabin.

I laid awake wondering what to do in the morning.  Do I build a fire to incinerate the critter?  Do I take the stove pipe apart?  What can I put down the chimney to snag the bird?  Aha!  Duct tape on the end of a set of rods!

I finally fell into a fitful sleep, sometimes waking to more scratching and peeping.

At six the alarm went off.  I had lots to do for the day.  Slowly, bit by bit, I washed my face and put on my contact lenses, folded the bed into a couch, read the newspaper online, ate breakfast, and other odds and ends.

Finally a bit after eight I am ready to rescue the bird.  I assemble the chimney brush rods and set them on the roof.  I put the ladder against the roof.  I get my hard hat with ear protectors and a screen face plate.  I don’t want to be pecked or scratched.  I get my work gloves and tool belt.  Into the tool belt I put a flashlight, scissors, and a roll of duct tape.

Up the ladder I go!  Take storm cap off chimney.  Peer down chimney.  It’s just a black hole.  Shine flashlight down hole.  The soot just eats the light.  Maybe I should put new batteries in the flashlight.  Wait a minute!  I have a work light.

Down the ladder.  Get work light and 100 foot extension cord on a reel.  Plug cord into outlet on side of cabin.  Plug light into cord to check.  After some jiggling I have a good connection.

Up the ladder with the light and the cord reel.  Get the work light in place.  It doesn’t come on!  Jiggle the connection.  It works.  Look down the chimney again.  The light doesn’t come on.  Repeat previous steps.  Finally the light is on pointing down the chimney.  The soot eats the light.  Maybe the light from the work light is too diffuse.  I’ll try new batteries in the flashlight.

Down the ladder.  Cut open new package of batteries.  Replace batteries.  Check flashlight.  Great, it’s quite a bit brighter.

Up the ladder.  Shine flashlight down chimney.  Flashlight doesn’t work!  Unscrew cap and reseat cap.  Now it works.  Shine down chimney.  It looks like there is a spot of light down there.  But I can’t really see anything ten feet down a matte black tube.

OK, I’ll try to get the bird out blind.  Cut piece of duct tape.  Good sign, it doesn’t fold on itself.  Wrap tape around end of rod, twist tape so sticky side is out when I make a loose loop.  Twist and wrap other end around rod.

Stick rod down chimney.  Slowly, slowly, gently, gently.  I don’t want to crush the bird.  I feel the bird at about ten feet.  The rod feels just a bit heavier.  Pull up and out.  What is this dark blob I see?  Just soot covered duct tape!  Put another loop of tape on end of rod.

Stick rod down chimney.  Slowly, slowly, gently, gently.  I feel the bird.  I pull up.  The rod doesn’t feel heavier.  Try again.  The rod is going down further!  It’s going past the damper!  It won’t come back up!  The tape is catching the damper!

Oh great!  Am I going to have take the stove pipe apart after all?  Keep trying.  Again.  Again.  On the fourth try the tape comes through the damper, I hope.  Feel around again for the bird.  Ah!  I think I have it.  Up gently, gently, slowly, slowly.  Don’t bang the rod and bird against the side of the chimney.

The end of the rod is in sight.  I see a gray lump.  It looks furry.  I see one webbed wing.  I see a big pink hole opening and closing as the bat gasps for air or screeches threats.

I set the rod down and the bat falls off or extricates itself from the sticky duct tape.

The bat lies on the roof on its belly with its wings and legs splayed out.  Oh!  I should take a picture of the bat.  As I turn around to start down the ladder to get my camera, I see the bat gliding into the nearby trees.

I laugh and sigh at my accomplishment.  I can’t believe that I succeeded in my wishful plan.  From the roof I look out over our little domain of outbuildings surrounded by acres and acres of trees.  I feel the rush of yesterday fade away to serenity.

©2001, 2007 Melvyn D. Magree

Hunter, know your ground!

’Tis the season for blam, blam, and blam from an unknown distance.  Is it on my cabin property or is it on Forest Service land?  It may be a nuisance on Forest Service land, but I have no right to stop people from hunting there.

Unfortunately, there are a few hunters who think they have the right to shoot from wherever they please.  Some years ago, a hunter shot right down our driveway with a red pickup clearly visible.

A couple of years ago, a pair of hunters shot from the road into our property, entering ten feet from a “No Trespassing” sign, about 100 feet from an occupied building on the opposite side of the road, and less than 500 feet from our cabin.

Last year a pair of hunters shot into our property within 500 feet of our cabin and less than 100 feet from a cabin on the other side of the road.

I guess they have other priorities than knowing the Minnesota Department of Natural Resources (DNR) hunting regulations:

On another person’s private land or a public right-of-way, a person may not discharge a firearm within 500 feet of a building occupied by humans or livestock without permission.

It seems some bird hunters are more prone to ignore “property rights” than deer hunters.  Many bird hunters cruise the roads looking for likely spots along the road and pay no attention to land use. 

Many deer hunters occupy a stand and know exactly where they are.  In fact, some of my deer hunter friends do not think much of bird hunters.  Even if they hunt birds themselves, they have disdain for bird hunters who don’t respect property rights.

We’ve always assumed that we had to post our land with “No Trespassing” or “No Hunting” signs.  We’ve found it annoying and time consuming.  Why should we have to post our land?  Shouldn’t the hunters know where they are hunting?

Many counties have plat maps available.  St. Louis County had KMZ files that one could overlay on Google Earth.  The KMZ files contain the property information for every parcel in the county.  Now St. Louis county has gone one step further and has all this information online with Google Earth maps.  See http://gis.stlouiscountymn.gov/planningflexviewers/county_explorer/.  With this you can “fly” to any area of the county and know which land is private, county, state, or federal.  If you have a computer, there is no excuse for not knowing where you are hunting.

Carlton and Lake Counties have information by parcel, but you need a street address to find this information.  See http://www.parcelinfo.com/.

You can also get public hunting maps from major sports retailers.

The DNR regulations are a bit ambiguous.  The 2014 regulations state:

“Always ask permission before entering private land. Any entry onto the private property of another without permission is considered trespass.  Land owners may be able to pursue court action against trespassers whether the property is posted or not.”

Two notable exceptions are that a hunter may enter land that is not posted to retrieve a wounded animal or to retrieve a hunting dog.  In the latter case the hunter may not carry a firearm.  In both cases the hunter must be on foot.

But then after the second suggestion that hunters always ask permission to enter non-posted lands, the regulations state the requirements for posting!  Signs must be posted every year, must have letters of a certain height, have landowner name or signature, and be posted at certain intervals.  The intervals are at the corner of every parcel and in wooded areas every 500 feet or less.  But if some hunters ignore signs, why even bother?

Those who ignore property lines or “No Trespassing” signs should be lucky they don’t live in a “Stand your ground” state.  Consider that a cranky old man is sitting with a shotgun hidden among the trees, just waiting for you to step from the road.  Blam!  You’re dead!  Does the cranky old man even have to to be in a “Stand your ground” state?  A sympathetic jury may consider his actions self-defense.

To end on a positive note;

I don’t eat meat anymore, and when I did, I considered hunting an expensive way to get meat.  Others disagree and enjoy hunting, fishing, and the food it gives them.  If you are one of these people, if you know where you are, and if you have permission to hunt there, may you have a good hunting season.  May you get your limit in the time you want to spend.  May you enjoy each meal from your hunting.

Mel can’t complain too much about noise:  He does operate noisy equipment.  But so do his neighbors and all know where the sound is coming from.

Hunters should oppose "Stand Your Ground" laws

Once again it is that tiresome time of year in the Northland.  Off in the distance, bang!  Too close for comfort, bang!  Bird season has started and then next month is deer season with a few other hunting seasons thrown in.

Last time I checked, landowners in Minnesota are supposed to post their property with "No Trespassing" signs every 300-500 feet.  In other words, hunters were free to trespass on private land that was not posted.

Even if posted, some hunters ignore the signs or even evidence that they were shooting into private property.  One fall a bird hunter shot down our driveway with our red pickup plainly visible.  My wife happened to be nearby and yelled at him.  He grabbed his bird, ran to his truck, and drove off as quickly as he could.

What if my wife had a gun in her hand?  If Minnesota had a "Stand Your Ground" law, would she be in the right to shoot the trespassing hunter?

Last season some bird hunters shot into our land where there was no brush under the power line.  There were "No Trespassing" signs within 300 feet of where they shot.  What if I had been walking on a trail that paralleled the road and had a gun with me.  Would I have been "standing my ground" to shoot back?  They were also shooting within 200 feet of an occupied dwelling on the other side of the road.

Given that a GPS unit costs less than most rifles and that St. Louis County, Minnesota, publishes plat maps, available free online, listing all the properties and owners, should landowners even be required to post their property?

Responsible hunters know where they hunt and respect property rights.  They would be safe.  But the few irresponsible hunters give the impression that all hunters do not respect property rights.  These irresponsible hunters should be very glad that Minnesota doesn't have a "Stand Your Ground" law.